Serving Burgers & Booze Since 1992 view shopping cart

WHAT WE’RE DOING

BUSINESS PLAN

We opened The Vortex to have fun. Period. That was our entire business plan. We had absolutely no idea what we were getting ourselves into. We learned by doing. Opening, operating and growing this business over the years has been a lot of hard work. It has also been an education, a labor of love and the best time of our lives.

HOUSE RULES

We have never taken ourselves too seriously. We don’t think anyone should. We just want to hang-out with cool people. So on the day we encountered our first rude customer, we decided to take on the challenge of educating people about how to behave in public. More precisely, how to behave in our bar. We began by compiling a set of “House Rules.” Every time we ran across somebody who acted like a great big jerk, we’d add another rule to the list. We eventually titled this compilation of rules, “Stuff You Really Need To Know,” and printed it on the cover of our menu.

IDIOT BAROMETER

People who are offended by our House Rules tend to be the high-maintenance, self-absorbed idiots we prefer didn’t come to our bar in the first place. So our House Rules act as an “Idiot Barometer.” They help us keep tight-assed idiots out, while simultaneously attracting people who are fun, laid-back, and looking to have a good time. The truth is, our loyal fans already know how to behave in bars, and have always loved our no-nonsense approach. They know we’re just having fun, and they’re in on the joke. Having a good time is what The Vortex is all about, so it couldn’t have worked out better.

MISSION STATEMENT

We are realists. We completely understand that some people will like what we offer, and others will not. And that’s totally okay. We have never tried to be all things to all people. We just do what we do, for the people that like what we do. After all, we couldn’t have grown our business over the years without our loyal fans. So running our bar is like hosting a big party for our best friends. That’s why our staff is genuine, fun, friendly and ultimately, professional. It’s also why we offer a lively atmosphere, award-winning food and an extensive selection of booze and specialty cocktails. All day. Every day. We do what we do because we love our loyal fans. And our loyal fans love us in return. When it comes right down to it, The Vortex is really all about the love. Maybe some “hater’s gonna hate,”  but nobody wants those idiots spoiling everyone else’s fun anyway.

LOCATIONS

Location Info
Location Info